The Wait

Life never seems to go smoothly. I was so nervous and ready to go, and now I’m sitting in a hotel room waiting. Our flight was delayed, and delayed, and delayed. And then finally canceled and rescheduled for 24 hours from the original time. However it was mechanical issues that caused the delay with the plane, so I’m very happy they caught it and were able to fix it. 

Only downside was sitting in the airport for 4 hours waiting to find out our flight wasn’t going to leave the ground. And the waiting made for a very unhappy baby. I sure had my hands full with him last night. 

They let us get our bags from the baggage claim and settled us into the hotel attached to the airport for the night. It’s a pretty fabulous room and very spacious for just the two of us. Silas had been sleeping and playing while we waited for our plane so he ate the food I had on me. So I was starving when we finally got to our room. And luckly for me, the room service food was amazing! Expensive, but amazing. I had a steak sandwich and it was so good (and not just because I was starving) which made the whole delay seem a hell of a lot better! Now all there is to worry about today is figuring out my connection once we arrive in Iceland, as they will have to rebook us. 

The sun is starting to come up and I have no doubt that my little monster will be up shortly and terrorizing the airport. Ugh. 12 hours till takeoff. All spent in the airport. Wish me luck

The Big Leap

That suddenly over whelming moment when you take a big leap, rather than baby steps. It terrifies me but I love it and vice versa. I love being terrified by big changes, adventures and new experiences. Rather than ease into things, I just jump in head first.

I love traveling. I love being creative. I LOVE food. And I hate living the life society (and my mother) want me to live. Don’t get me wrong, routine is great to an extent, but it feels like I’m being forced into it.

I’ve spent years planning for my lovely suburban life with the perfect house, the perfect vehicle, every little thing placed neatly in its spot. Kids, husband, a dog… Hell, I’ll even throw in the pool. And can’t forget the job. 

But that… Just isn’t me. 

I may not know who I am yet, and I may not know exactly what I want from my life, nor do I know where it will take me. But one thing I do know is what I don’t want. I don’t want a mortgage and car payments weighing me down. I don’t want to work 9-5 Monday to Friday, sitting at a desk doing the same thing every day. Being stationary makes me miserable… And kind of fat. And lazy. Routine makes me less ambitious, even depressed. And I’ve come to realize that I don’t want the husband, because I’m happy doing my own thing. I have one amazing little boy that I do everything with and take everywhere. I am so unbelievably lucky to be a single mother! Times can get tough when you do things alone, but I have the freedom to pack up and leave on an adventure to wherever I want, whenever I want! With little silas in tow of course. 

I have such a desire to live every day like its my last, to see everything there is and to utilize every opportunity i am faced with. I want to live an ‘unconventional’ lifestyle. I want my son to grow up knowing that anything is possible and that dreams are always within reach if we just allow ourselves to overcome our fear of failure. 

We leave in less than two weeks for a backpacking trip around europe, which is our second trip (our first was to england to visit family a few months back) and I think it’s safe to say that I’ve caught the travel bug. I researched a fair bit into pretty much every aspect of a europe trip and one night, I just started booking my hostels and figuring out my dates. I did it without a second thought, and the next day I was confronted with the ‘oh shit’ moment of ‘Am I really going to do this?!’ 

And I am. The whole thought makes me nervous and excited. Leaving the security of home and venturing off into the world. And with a baby no less! I feel so liberated by stretching outside my comfort zone and overcoming my fear. 

You can do anything. You are strong and capable of conquering your fears.